ORGANIZED RECUPERATION

Before one of my more nasty surgeries, I spent a lot of time planning my post-surgery activities.  Yes, I’m also one of those obnoxious organizers who plans everything down to the millisecond. I love lists and charts and organizing things – anything – mine or someone else’s. It doesn’t matter to me.

I knew I wouldn’t be able to drive for quite a while.  I also knew I would have several physical limitations.  I’ve always been very active, so I felt I needed to fill every moment of my recovery.  I planned to do a lot of reading while I recuperated.  I love to read and usually only manage to fit in a few pages at bedtime before I close my eyes and drop the book – you know what that’s like.  I planned all sorts of craft projects – I love craft projects, almost as much as organizing.  I would watch old movies, write children’s books based on my grandchildren.  I even went out and bought a few jigsaw puzzles!  Now that one is really amusing since I never liked jigsaw puzzles when I was well.  Why would I want to torture myself with them now? 

After 9 days in the hospital, my return home was such a relief. However, my well laid plans went sort of awry.  Crafts were pretty much out since they required a longer attention span than I was able to muster.  Mine was now that of a flea.  Books weren’t too bad as long as they didn’t mention cancer, sickness, death, violence, or medical procedures.  The same went for TV.  Of course all my favorite shows revolved around cops, forensics, murder, special victims unit, emergency rooms, hospitals – NONE of which were now tolerable.  I simply couldn’t stomach them.  They made me incredibly nervous and nauseas.  I forced myself to work on the jigsaw puzzles I had bought.  I quickly realized that once the outer edge was done, so was I.  Watching old movies was almost as bad as doing the puzzles.  I tried computer games and, thankfully, they consumed part of each day. 

I did have one other thing that occupied some of my time.  Every day, twice a day, for about 3 months, I was visited by a home health nurse.  She was an RN with an advanced degree in panic, depression, and general mayhem.  I was alive, and there was a good chance I shouldn’t have been, so I was truly frightened.  My emotions were raw and very close to the surface.  This angel of mercy had her own way of soothing her patients.  In all fairness to her, due to a number of complications that I suffered after the surgery, she did have her work cut out for her.  However, she would routinely regale me with detailed stories of people who had died horrific deaths from all types of cancer.  Daily, no twice daily, she would discuss which of her patients had died recently – what her parents, cousins, and neighbors had died of – what her children were probably going to die of some day because of their lifestyles – what she would like her ex-husbands to die of (preferably sooner than later).  I finally begged her not to discuss death, in any form, any longer.  I was simply unable to handle it.  She begrudgingly agreed and we spent the last few weeks discussing her garden and her treasured plants, all of which were on the verge of – you’ve got it – DEATH! She would always time her second visit of the day to coincide with the nightly re-run of Two and a Half Men.  She loved the show and would drag out her paperwork until it was over.  I had two choices – adopt her or learn to pack my own wounds.  I quickly learned my way around surgical wound care. 

Well, the infections cleared up, the wounds healed, and I can once again watch the goriest medical show on TV.  Oh yes, my CA-125 returned to normal ranges, Thank God! I had entered my first remission stage.   

SURVIVAL  TIP  FOR  TODAY:   BE GOOD TO YOURSELF!  Do whatever makes YOU happy, especially while recuperating.  Your body knows what you need – listen to it!